I Love My Job, Its The Work I Hate

I’m gonna warn you up front, this story is a bit gross..so if i you find it unappealing forget about reading this entry.

The star of this story isn't me; it's a friend of mine. He's name is Bobet. I was chatting with him over Blackberry Messenger this morning and he shared me one hell of a story about his recent trip to Amsterdam.

Him and a group of our common friends went there for a convention cum holiday trip doing all the standard things people do in Amsterdam - hitting the “coffee shops,” the Van Gogh museum, and ultimately a sex show.

Now, this wasn't your standard sex show. In fact, there was no sex at all. It featured a well-past-her-prime woman who would lie down onstage and challenge members of the audience to try and shit on her face for 50 euros. Yes, shit in her face. If successful, you won a cash prize.

Paying over 100 American dollars to try and defecate on this haggard creature in front of a crowd of drunk weirdoes sounded like a punishment to me. Not Bobet. Knowing him, he's a person who always likes a challenge. So he handed over his 50 euros and dropped trow. Alas, with the combination of unanticipated stage fright and the woman blowing air from her mouth directly on his asshole, shitting was impossible. Bobet failed. In fact, all the challengers failed that evening.

The rest of our friends thought it was a hilarious adventure. But Bobet was pissed. He wanted a rematch. To prepare for the ensuing battle, he spent the whole next day stockpiling ammunition by constantly eating olives and nuts and pounding red wine like he was the second coming of Bacchus.

When they returned to the show the following day he was buckling over in pain he had to shit so bad. Finally the big moment came, Bobet's rematch..tandadaraaannn!

Onstage, he could barely get his pants off because his bowels were so pent up. The woman does this for a living; she could clearly tell what was happening inside Bobet's tummy. She calmly braced herself as…

Bobet unleashed a devastating fury of diarrhea into this poor woman's face! Come to think of it, it's horrifying. The woman stoically got up and walked off stage. Bobet had won, though he said he didn’t look overjoyed. Now he wanted to apologize to the woman. The woman had a shockingly pragmatic attitude about the whole thing. She explained that she makes a lot of money for only 30 minutes of work a night, and about once a week, someone actually shits in her face. Then she takes a shower and goes home.

I learned something from that small conversation and story i had over at BBM with my friend. In a way, aren't most jobs worse than that? We're all proverbially shit-on, stabbed in the back, overworked and underpaid at work, but for most people it's not something you can easily wash off with soap and it happens far more than once a week.

So learn to appreciate and love your job, even if its the work you hate, feel lucky that you not getting shit on your face, literally :D