It’s that day again; that historic moment that will forever make its way to our youth’s school textbooks, that significant event that ended Spain’s grip on our forebears for good, that spectacular time when the Philippine flag was waved at the balcony of President Emilio Aguinaldo at Kawit, Cavite… that eternal memory etched in history that showed Filipino’s capability for bravery and unswerving patriotism… it’s Independence Day!
However, as time passes by, the former glory of the 12th of June steadily deteriorates, becoming nothing more than a generic holiday where people can rest from work, where teenagers get to hang out somewhere and stuff like that. Independence Day has become your mundane secular “Sabbath” day.
In the face of these events, president PNoy has something in mind to remind Filipinos of the wonders of Independence Day. Below is an excerpt from http://newsinfo.inquirer.net
President Benigno Aquino III wants Filipinos to be proactive and reflect on how they can contribute to the independence they now enjoy as the country celebrates its 114th Independence Day on Tuesday, MalacaƱang said on Saturday.
The President seem to be saying; we should go beyond greeting each other a happy independence day… It has to be an empowered Independence Day. It’s not just celebrating it and then forgetting about it the following day because it’s no longer a holiday, but we really have to live it. Everyone has to have an empowered Independence Day so we can be proactive and among ourselves think about how to keep contributing to that independence that we now enjoy,”
Oh well, that is just sweet..
The Palace has full of ideas. PNoy himself will lead the Independence Day rites at the Barasoain Church, situated at Malolos, Bulacan. It is at this Church that the First Philippine Republic was recognized.
Even the Department of Education (DepEd) is also teeming with ideas to bring more color in this celebration;
In a memorandum to all schools and DepEd offices, Education Secretary Armin Luistro directed all education personnel to “give full support, assistance and cooperation” to activities to be held between May and June in celebration of the country’s independence.
“The DepEd encourages all officials at the national, regional, division and school levels, teachers and students to actively participate in all scheduled activities,” Luistro said in Memorandum 98 issued last week.
Luistro said the Independence Day celebration aims to “re-awaken the Filipino people, especially the youth, to their responsibility and patriotic commitment to truly demonstrate the spirit of heroism, patriotism, nationalism, unity and national identity.”
Really now..
Other events include displaying the Philippine flags on schools, holding discussions about the history of June 12, 1898 and organizing activities like essay writing and public speaking, all to remind Filipinos of “the greatness of the Filipino race” through stories of sacrifice of those who fought for independence.
While the administration’s robustness to keep the people excited about this part of our history may be appreciable to an extent, it’s quite unlikely that the participants, most of which are sure to be students, are 100% willing to participate to begin with. For all we know, most of them would probably frown at the thought of having to work their butts off for a festive celebration of a day that’s so buried in history already. As to the rest, it’s likely that they’ll just shrug off the festivities and get some rest before going back to the workplace, or complain about the traffic that might ensue from the plans the government has in mind.
Now, I don’t have problems with recognizing or celebrating Independence Day, per se' (just in case you’re having ideas). However, I must point out a possible, even probable reason for my increasingly bland reception of June 12. Having to celebrate an event from the very distant past, 114 years ago to be exact, can be quite tiresome because I myself, is sadly; already so detached from it.
Of course there is the exception of hardcore patriots more than eager to get involved in the program, but the time of brave Filipinos wielding vintage rifles and wearing salakot hats is over. The time of revolutionary groups forged on nationalism like the Kataas-taasang, Kagalang-galangang Katipunan ng mga Anak ng Bayan (KKK) is over. Heck, even the colorful life of Dr. Jose Rizal, our national hero, is also over, although it is a mandatory inclusion in our educational curriculum.
The reason why a Filipino like me became more and more indifferent to this event in our history; Independence Day, is because I can relate to it less and less throughout the years. It’s becoming less and less relevant to more important matters, such as our daily lives, for example. Of course the memories encapsulated in June 12 will remain gems of our history.. of course they will be studied by future generations, but that’s it. The existence of a strong link that binds our personal lives to our rich history has been blurred to near non-existence.
Still, I wish the sincere celebrants of Independence Day the best of luck; so that they may keep the flames of history rekindled in their hearts for their sake (talk about cheesy).
These rants of mine about the sad state of the 12th of June led me to think this way: since people are so disconnected from the past, how about we bring the concept of independence to a more personal level? After all, there are lot of things our society is not free from.
How about… independence from drugs? There is a prevailing case of drug abuse in our country. We can try that. How about… independence from smoking? We can take the testimonies of smoking quitters and inspire people with their conviction. There may be more similar suggestions, but I feel that these might not be enough. There is a need for a kind of independence that’s sure to concern every Filipino from all walks of life -- even if he’s already free, on the process of being free or not free at all. Perhaps this calls for a specific concept: independence from the dysfunctions of modern Filipino culture.
How about we celebrate June 12 by declaring ourselves independent from a defunct version of Pinoy Pride, where we claim the achievements of individuals as our own, and then proclaim to the world that we are the best race, damn the others? How about we declare ourselves independent from this parasitic attitude that justifies a Filipino’s incapability to achieve something on his own by arguing that his brethren’s achievement is also his?
Indeed, I pointed this out in one of my conversations with a fellow Filipino friend of mine not too long ago:
Filipinos with a misplaced pride are no exception, for the reason that their pride is, well-- misplaced. Vain Filipinos tend to bash in the skulls of people who point out the flaws in our society, our traditional ills and our misconduct, further revealing how badly mannered a good number of our fellowmen are. Filipinos have bombarded critical thinkers with names such as “nerds,” “geeks,” and “anti-Filipino,” claiming that they’re just jealous of their achievements. I can almost hear them say:
“You’re just jealous because we’ve accomplished so much as a nation. We’re a hardworking race, and we can adapt to any environment. You all go to hell!”
I do not tell you, my dear Filipinos, to abandon your pride in what you have accomplished. I’m simply asking you to put your pride within the context of the situation, for if we look in the bigger picture of things, our individual and collective accomplishments have yet to live up to our vain fantasies.
How about we celebrate Independence Day by declaring ourselves independent from aversion to intellectuals? A social cancer that was discovered by Rizal remains alive today, continuously dividing the laymen from those considered as intellectuals, like the sad scenario between Pilosopo Tasyo and the townspeople in Rizal’s Noli Me Tangere.
Instead, we laud the charisma of our celebrities, their curious ability to dish out some drama and captivate the Filipino audience into putting them in the intellectual pedestal to our own detriment. Just ask Philippine politics.
We Filipino's willingly subjugate ourselves to the influence of these famous figures, blindly following them around and fastidiously clinging to their promises, without analyzing whether they can really achieve this, given the very little fact that they’re not really politicians in the first place. I think my cousin Anton Hernadez would agree with me about that ;) Because he himself is disgusted with showbiz people in politics.
Lastly, how about we celebrate Independence Day by declaring ourselves independent from Yellow politics altogether? For more than two decades, the Yellow culture stemming from the historic EDSA I revolution spearheaded by former President Corazon Aquino has permeated the Filipino personage, producing the masses who are so enamored with the current administration, despite several in-your-face atrocities committed by our esteemed president, Benigno Simeon “Noynoy” Aquino III, including the vindictive impeachment trial of ex-Chief Justice Renato Corona (which is generously explained by several articles in this website), his refusal to sign the bank secrecy waiver despite his campaign promise, and his penchant for being a chatterbox. Isn’t it time for us to start freeing ourselves from this suffocating display of thick-faced hubris? After all this time, shouldn’t we start working our way towards our freedom from the politics of the oligarchy?
Of course, there will be more concepts of independence that may be brought up in the future, but the way I see it, these independences seem most prominent, most relevant, and most pressing. After all, pretty much all of us stood and still stand witness to these prisons: the prison of vanity, the intellectual prison, and what seems to be the biggest prison of our lives; Philippine politics.
Celebrating a personal Independence Day will not warrant a festive aura, or little flags dangling across your community, or organized writing contests, or even a play re-enacting the bravery of our history’s heroes, but at least it will be more personal to each and every one of us. At least, we will be able to relate to such kind of independence, since we worked our way to it ourselves. In a more cynical note, yes, and it will save money.
The way I see it, the best way for us to truly establish a culture of independence, is for us to be independent from the errors of our own culture.
Monday, June 11, 2012
Saturday, June 9, 2012
Why Do You Inspire So Much Hate, Apple?
Apple Worldwide Developers Conference starts Monday. As with any such event that involves Apple announcing new products, the global outpouring of love will be matched by a rising outpouring of hate.
Some people hate Apple. Other people hate people who hate Apple. Many of these haters have turned pro, leading to a lucrative “hater industrial complex.”
I know, because I’ve been the target of hate from both sides. I’m on the hate list of both the most extreme anti-Apple haters and pro-Apple haters.
Passion in technology, flame-wars, fanboyism and its discontents are nothing new. But in the past couple of years, something new has happened: The loudest, most insistent hate is now coming from the anti-Apple crowd, rather than the pro-Apple people.
I’ll tell you why below.
Also, it needs to be said: Haters are rare. The vast majority of users — and the vast majority of bona fide fans — don’t fall into the “hater” category. But haters appear to be everywhere because they’re active and vocal, and their rants memorable.
But first, let’s understand once and for all who hates, how they hate, and why.
There’s No Hater Like a Pro-Apple Hater
For decades, the most vocal, active and vicious haters were Apple fans. Apple fanboyism used to be about computers, and Apple systems have always been in the minority.
The main rival and object of Apple-fan derision, Microsoft, Windows and Windows users, had the luxury of remaining more aloof in the platform wars because Windows’ dominance was so absolute, or appeared to be.
To the Apple fan, there was so much to mock and deride about Windows and its apologists that a market, of sorts, emerged for anti-Windows rants. As a result of this demand, a career path was born: The professional fanboy troll hater. Reading these obsessive, detailed and often apoplectic attack pieces became a kind of entertainment for Apple fans.
Professional pro-Apple trolls make their living seeking out criticism of Apple and Apple products, and nit-picking every word to death. A typical counter-argument will literally post an article sentence-by-sentence, with long-winded argument leveled against every word.
The trolls make their living with blogs and even otherwise respectable publications by pushing the facts to an extreme, and combining personal attacks with mockery to excite emotion in the reader.
The reason this works economically is that the emotion and controversy is a win-win. When they attack you, a non-response is a win for the troll. They win the argument by forfeiture. Their readers see the attack, but not the rebuttal. They encounter the object of that attack exclusively through the context set up by the troll, so even the criticized article is presented in a way that routes around objective judgement.
But if you defend yourself or attack them back, that’s an even bigger win for the troll, because it drives traffic to their sites and posts and helps them build their “brand” and name recognition.
This is the same dynamic that has fueled the rise in obnoxious political talk radio and cable TV, and has ruined political discourse in the United States. Hate-filled, personal attack rants have a better “meme” quality than reasoned discourse. So the haters win.
Another curious anomaly in the pro-Apple hater racket is that they operate on a blacklist system. Once you’ve crossed Apple in any way ever, you’re on the blacklist and can never get off. (Not coincidentally, this is the case with Apple itself. Ask any journalist who can’t get an invitation to any Apple event.)
In just a few years, my entry on the professional pro-Apple troll hater blacklist will exceed the lifespan of Ayatollah Ruhollah Khomeini’s fatwa against Salman Rushdie.
Sometimes I write things that are so pro-Apple and heavily talked about that the professional pro-Apple trolls are forced to acknowledge the existence of these articles. But they often do so in the context of the blacklist, saying things like my having the correct opinion was a “fluke” or “accidental.” Or they say my objectivity is evidence of dishonesty.
Pro-Apple haters are really like no other in both scope, magnitude and longevity. And they used to corner the market. But no more.
Rise of the Anti-Apple hater
When Steve Jobs returned to Apple in the late nineties, and led the company’s absolutely brilliant program for the transformation of content consumption (iPod and, later, iOS products), changing market conditions began a shift in the relationship between Apple, it’s fans and the hater industrial complex.
In a nutshell, Apple has evolved from “our” company to “everybody’s” company in the minds of Apple fanboys.
Yes, OS X systems are still a minority, with most computers in the world still running Windows. But focus has shifted from PCs to mobile, and in mobile, Apple is no underdog.
The iPhone in particular is a totally mainstream product. And the iPad invented and now dominates its category like no other product in the history of consumer electronics. So the edge has been taken off some of the pro-Apple hate. But it’s added something to the anti-Apple hate camp.
Why? Because if you believe (as the anti-Apple haters do) that Apple steals other people’s ideas, doesn’t invent anything, succeeds only through pretty hardware and manipulative marketing, then Apple’s success is undeserved — a wrong that must be set right.
Every news cycle brings with it more undeserved praise. Apple is the most valuable company in the world. Steve Jobs was the greatest CEO of the decade. iPhone makes more profit than all other phone makers combined. Judge sides with Apple in patent dispute.
These facts rankle anti-Apple haters like Windows’ success used to rankle Mac fans.
Three other reasons for the rise of anti-Apple hate start with “G” and end with “oogle.”
You would think that Google’s entry into the mobile platform business would drive more pro-Apple hate than anti-Apple hate, but you’d be wrong.
Android is in every way an alternative to iOS. First, Android phones and tablets are an alternative to iPhones and iPads at the point of purchase (unless you’re in an Apple store). Second, they’re theoretical opposites, with the iOS owned and controlled by the hardware maker, and Android an open system where hardware makers don’t even need to send Google an email before basing an entire product line around it.
Android has gathered some serious fans. No, not the I’m-familiar-with-it-and-therefore-it’s-good variety of fans that Windows engenders, but serious, passionate affinity of the kind that Apple motivates.
Needless to say, Android fans tend to really hate Apple and, by extension, Apple products, Apple users, Apple Stores, Apple ads, Apple everything.
Second, Apple is polarizing the community with its “thermonuclear war” against Google as a reaction against Android. Apple is dropping Google products one-by-one from shipping iOS devices. It’s working with Twitter and Facebook very closely to oppose Google+ and Google. Apple is suing every Google partner it can over mobile patents.
And, third, Google+, which isn’t even a year old yet, has emerged as a hotbed of Android love and iOS hate. If you can imagine the degree of Apple advocacy that would exist on an Apple-created alternative to Facebook, then you can imagine how the Google+ community talks about Android.
I post a lot of items on Google+ that praise or appear to praise Apple or Apple products in one way or another. As a result, I’ve been blocked, criticized, called a pathetic Apple fanboy. I’ve been accused of taking money from Apple for my opinions, and worse.
While many of my pro-Android posts go sailing straight to the Google+ “What’s Hot” list — essentially “voted up” by the community via Plus-ones, Shares and Comments — most of my pro-iOS posts tend to languish in obscurity, ignored or dismissed by the Google+ community.
Another contributor to the rise in anti-Apple hate is the decline and fall of Microsoft Windows. The operating system is still on top, theoretically. But two trends are hammering away at it. First, there’s a general shift from desktop computing, where Windows rules, to mobile computing, where iOS and Android rule.
Second, even on desktop and laptop computing, there’s a serious chipping away by Apple at Microsoft’s lead. Apple has been on the rise for years, and Microsoft on the decline.
This trend has freaked out some Windows fans, and cause them to step up their anti-Apple language online.
And finally, the Linux and open systems advocates have reason to attack Apple. With Apple’s rise and dominance of the mobile market, at least from a profits and revenue perspective if not from a market share one, the expected Open Systems Age of Aquarius that they believed in looks less and less likely every year. So they’re turning up the heat on Apple as well.
Why So Much Hate?
The thing to understand about the kind of hate Apple inspires, both in favor and against Apple, is that it’s not unique. The exact same phenomenon occurs in politics, religion and many other areas of human culture.
First and foremost, it’s about identity. Our computers, tablets and phones literally become part of us — our minds use them as peripheral memory, and we off-load processing to them from our brains. They see things, hear things and find things for us. They give us super-human powers of awareness, knowledge, communication and more.
Because we identify with these products, an attack on them can feel like an attack on us.
And as with politics or religion, one’s opinions are often inescapable within the context in which one views the world.
For example, there’s a strong correlation in politics between advocacy for gun control and whether one lives in an urban or rural area. To city slickers, guns represent criminality and violence. To country folks, they represent survival and protection. Not always, but usually. The point is that context determines and almost dictates your opinions about things.
Likewise, there are contexts for using consumer electronics. Some people view them as “computers,” boxes filled with technologies that function as all-purpose tool-boxes for the curious tinkerer. Others view them as “appliances” that are to be judged on the degree to which they “just work” without problems or glitches.
If your context for consumer electronics is the former, you’ll hate Apple. If the latter, you’ll love Apple. Not always, but usually.
The facts are so clear from within one’s context that anyone who denies them can only be 1) stupid; 2) evil; 3) corrupt; 4) gullible; or 5) all of the above.
These are categories for all pro-Apple and anti-Apple hater attacks. And they exist because combatants view consumer electronics in distinct contexts.
People tend to be blind to bad things they’re familiar with, but overly critical of bad things they’re less familiar with. This is the source of nationalism, for example.
Most people think their own country is better than others. Since all countries can’t be objectively “better” than all other countries, nationalism is only possible by the inflated importance of good things about your own country, and a diminished importance of the bad things.
As people explore their platforms of choice, over time they find themselves impressed and thrilled by this feature or that decision by the company that makes the product. When they encounter the opposite in a competing product, they feel compelled to lash out at the transgression. Meanwhile, people become accustomed to the frustrations and design flaws in the computing platforms they use every day. This creates bias.
There’s also a sense of injustice that drives hate.
Apple fans see injustice in competing products clearly copying the look and feel of Apple products, from phone interfaces to handset design to ultra-slim laptops to all-in-one PCs. They see injustice in the Windows monopoly. They see injustice in everyone copying the app store concept, and in Microsoft copying the Apple Store concept.
Apple haters see injustice in Apple’s runaway success. They see injustice in iPhones being more-or-less comparable with or inferior to many Android phones, yet Apple gets most of the mobile phone profits? They see injustice in Apple taking credit for introducing technologies that already existed in competitive products. And they see injustice in Apple being rewarded for what they see as a controlling model for apps.
Perceived injustice instills a sense of mission to right the wrongs. And this brings out the hate speech.
Another source of hatred on both sides is Apple’s history of powerful advertising, which polarizes.
One example: Apple’s “Think Different” campaign. (You know, “here’s to the crazy ones, the misfits, the rebels”…) To Apple and Apple fans, the message of this campaign was “Apple products are designed for creativity, not just productivity.”
To people who had decided to use non-Apple system, the message was: “People who use Apple products are better and smarter people. People who don’t use Apple products are unsophisticated idiot goobers.” It felt like a personal attack.
Likewise with the “I’m a Mac, I’m a PC” campaign. Apple literally depicted what kind of person would use Windows, and what kind would use Mac. To pro-Apple fans, the ads highlighted in a funny way what they agreed were the flaws of Windows and PCs, and the benefits of Macs. But to non-Apple users, the message was clear: “Windows users are overweight, clueless, desperate, uncharismatic, unscrupulous, unattractive losers.” It made them wanna holler and they did, ergo: hate comments.
Stated another way, the history of Apple marketing has gone beyond a message that Apple products are better products. It conveyed that Apple people are better people.
Where’s the Love?
So where does the hate really come from? Ultimately, it comes from love.
Love and hate are not opposites. The opposite of love and hate is indifference.
You don’t see serious flame wars and hate around, say, the Symbian platform, or around companies like HP or Oracle. And that’s because nobody loves them. And if nobody loves them, nobody is going to hate them.
People love Apple products. People love Google products. And, yes, people even love Microsoft products. People also love Linux and open systems.
And all this love engenders passion. And passion drives hate. And that’s why Apple inspires so much of it.
Sunday, June 3, 2012
Best Quotes by Calvin and Hobbes
The perfect sentence is one from which nothing can be added or removed. Every word plays its part. In my more giddy moments I think that a simple comic strip featuring Calvin, a preternaturally bright six year-old, and Hobbes, his imaginary tiger friend, features some of the most lucid sentences committed to print. And when I sober up, I usually think exactly the same.
I think its about time I pay tribute to them by writing this entry. I have to admit, I'm a big fan. I basically grew up with Calvin and Hobbes, a comic strip back in the days that ran between 1985 and 1995. This comic managed to infuse wondering (and wandering) on a cosmic scale into an ageless world of lazy Sunday afternoons, snow goons, and life-bored youths like me. I’m not saying that you should take moral and philosophical guidance from the inventor of Calvinball (a game that runs on chaos theory), but you could do much worse.
So here, in no particular order, is a selection of quotes that nail everything from the meaning of life to special underwear. Enjoy.
On life’s constant little limitations
Calvin: You know, Hobbes, some days even my lucky rocket ship underpants don’t help.
On expectations
Calvin: Everybody seeks happiness! Not me, though! That’s the difference between me and the rest of the world. Happiness isn’t good enough for me! I demand euphoria!
On why we are scared of the dark
Calvin: I think night time is dark so you can imagine your fears with less distraction.
On the unspoken truth behind the education system
Calvin: As you can see, I have memorized this utterly useless piece of information long enough to pass a test question. I now intend to forget it forever. You’ve taught me nothing except how to cynically manipulate the system. Congratulations.
On the cruel reality of commercial art
Hobbes: Van Gogh would’ve sold more than one painting if he’d put tigers in them.
On the tragedy of hipsters
Calvin: The world bores you when you’re cool.
On the tears of a clown
Calvin: Isn’t it strange that evolution would give us a sense of humour? When you think about it, it’s weird that we have a physiological response to absurdity. We laugh at nonsense. We like it. We think it’s funny. Don’t you think it’s odd that we appreciate absurdity? Why would we develop that way? How does it benefit us?
Hobbes: I suppose if we couldn’t laugh at things that don’t make sense, we couldn’t react to a lot of life.
Calvin: (after a long pause) I can’t tell if that’s funny or really scary.
On the falling of sparrows (or providence’s lack of a timetable)
Calvin: Life is full of surprises, but never when you need one.
On the gaping hole in contemporary art’s soul
Calvin: People always make the mistake of thinking art is created for them. But really, art is a private language for sophisticates to congratulate themselves on their superiority to the rest of the world. As my artist’s statement explains, my work is utterly incomprehensible and is therefore full of deep significance.
On playing Frankenstein with words
Calvin: Verbing weirds language.
On realising God is more Woody Allen than Michael Bay
Calvin: They say the world is a stage. But obviously the play is unrehearsed and everybody is ad-libbing his lines.
Hobbes: Maybe that’s why it’s hard to tell if we’re living in a tragedy or a farce.
Calvin: We need more special effects and dance numbers.
On why ET is real
Calvin: Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us.
On looking yourself in the mirror
Hobbes: So the secret to good self-esteem is to lower your expectations to the point where they’re already met?
On the future
Calvin: Trick or treat!
Adult: Where’s your costume? What are you supposed to be?
Calvin: I’m yet another resource-consuming kid in an overpopulated planet, raised to an alarming extent by Madison Avenue and Hollywood, poised with my cynical and alienated peers to take over the world when you’re old and weak. Am I scary, or what?
On the truth
Calvin: It’s a magical world, Hobbes, ol’ buddy…Let’s go exploring!
Have a nice week ahead y'all! :D
I think its about time I pay tribute to them by writing this entry. I have to admit, I'm a big fan. I basically grew up with Calvin and Hobbes, a comic strip back in the days that ran between 1985 and 1995. This comic managed to infuse wondering (and wandering) on a cosmic scale into an ageless world of lazy Sunday afternoons, snow goons, and life-bored youths like me. I’m not saying that you should take moral and philosophical guidance from the inventor of Calvinball (a game that runs on chaos theory), but you could do much worse.
So here, in no particular order, is a selection of quotes that nail everything from the meaning of life to special underwear. Enjoy.
On life’s constant little limitations
Calvin: You know, Hobbes, some days even my lucky rocket ship underpants don’t help.
On expectations
Calvin: Everybody seeks happiness! Not me, though! That’s the difference between me and the rest of the world. Happiness isn’t good enough for me! I demand euphoria!
On why we are scared of the dark
Calvin: I think night time is dark so you can imagine your fears with less distraction.
On the unspoken truth behind the education system
Calvin: As you can see, I have memorized this utterly useless piece of information long enough to pass a test question. I now intend to forget it forever. You’ve taught me nothing except how to cynically manipulate the system. Congratulations.
On the cruel reality of commercial art
Hobbes: Van Gogh would’ve sold more than one painting if he’d put tigers in them.
On the tragedy of hipsters
Calvin: The world bores you when you’re cool.
On the tears of a clown
Calvin: Isn’t it strange that evolution would give us a sense of humour? When you think about it, it’s weird that we have a physiological response to absurdity. We laugh at nonsense. We like it. We think it’s funny. Don’t you think it’s odd that we appreciate absurdity? Why would we develop that way? How does it benefit us?
Hobbes: I suppose if we couldn’t laugh at things that don’t make sense, we couldn’t react to a lot of life.
Calvin: (after a long pause) I can’t tell if that’s funny or really scary.
On the falling of sparrows (or providence’s lack of a timetable)
Calvin: Life is full of surprises, but never when you need one.
On the gaping hole in contemporary art’s soul
Calvin: People always make the mistake of thinking art is created for them. But really, art is a private language for sophisticates to congratulate themselves on their superiority to the rest of the world. As my artist’s statement explains, my work is utterly incomprehensible and is therefore full of deep significance.
On playing Frankenstein with words
Calvin: Verbing weirds language.
On realising God is more Woody Allen than Michael Bay
Calvin: They say the world is a stage. But obviously the play is unrehearsed and everybody is ad-libbing his lines.
Hobbes: Maybe that’s why it’s hard to tell if we’re living in a tragedy or a farce.
Calvin: We need more special effects and dance numbers.
On why ET is real
Calvin: Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us.
On looking yourself in the mirror
Hobbes: So the secret to good self-esteem is to lower your expectations to the point where they’re already met?
On the future
Calvin: Trick or treat!
Adult: Where’s your costume? What are you supposed to be?
Calvin: I’m yet another resource-consuming kid in an overpopulated planet, raised to an alarming extent by Madison Avenue and Hollywood, poised with my cynical and alienated peers to take over the world when you’re old and weak. Am I scary, or what?
On the truth
Calvin: It’s a magical world, Hobbes, ol’ buddy…Let’s go exploring!
Have a nice week ahead y'all! :D
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